The Best and Worst Moments of Quarantine

Now quarantine is over here in Madrid and the name of this blog has essentially become redundant, it’s time to reflect on the good, the bad, and the ugly of the past few months. Believe it or not, I actually had a great time during quarantine, better than most it seems, and I had far more great moments than bad moments. People complained for months, even people in countries that weren’t quarantined. Sure, I had to queue for hours to get in to the grocery store and I have to wear a horrible mask everywhere I go, but that’s just something we have no other choice in doing. Here are the best and worst moments of the lockdown.

1. Chair game

Influenced by terrible click bait lists posted online with titles like “Ten Exciting Things To Do During Quarantine” that include really exciting things like “Watch a movie”, I grabbed a wooden chair from my flat, smashed it up, and created a board game with the seat of the chair. It’s an amalgam of Snakes and Ladders and Monopoly; a drinking game wherein every morning after playing it I’m pretty hungover, so I’d say it’s a huge success.

2. Drinking games

The reason Chair game was created was because we had already exhausted all other avenues of drinking. Here in Madrid, my girlfriend, my flat mate, and I managed to turn a drinking game out of just about everything… UNO (drink for a second for every card you have to pick up,) even sports games like badminton, which we set up indoors. The best of them all though, Centurion – in which you drink a shot of beer every minute for 100 minutes – was the most fun and most drunk I had gotten in months.

3. Learning to make pizza

For a hot minute all delivery apps were down. No longer could I order burritos from Uber Eats, Popeye’s from Deliveroo, or pizza from Glovo. I had no other choice but to, god forbid, learn how to cook. I started out making my own burgers from scratch. It didn’t take long until I perfected the shit out of that and I quickly needed a new challenge. So I started making my own pizza. I made the dough from scratch, the sauce from scratch, everything from scratch. I would have milked the cow to make mozzarella myself if I could. And it tastes bloody good. Only thing I have a problem with is making the dough in to a perfect circle.

4. Making The Office

After making the Chair Game it got real hard to keep ourselves entertained for several more months. But our creative minds pulled it off. I shot and edited our own quarantine version of The Office intro. Using the same iconic music as the American version of the show and having the exact same cuts as the intro, I think it came out pretty well. It wasted a good day of quarantine.

5. The first day of exercise

In Madrid, quarantine was insanely strict. Only being allowed out to visit the supermarket, you would risk getting a hefty fine and even up to one year in jail if you were caught outside for any reason other than to grocery shop. But about two months in, the quarantine was partially lifted between 8pm – 11pm to exercise only. The first evening was a true event. Roads were closed and there were thousands of people running who probably hadn’t exercised in years! There was this communal excitement to be free for a whole three hours.

And now the three worst moments…

1. My girlfriend cutting my hair

Butchered. Well and truly fucking butchered. There was no other choice. I hadn’t had my hair cut in close to four months and it looked like I was wearing a mousy brown helmet. After refusing to let her control the clippers for close to a month, it had reached the point where I had no other choice. My girlfriend spent 2.5 hours chopping off random strands and every ten minutes she would say something like “I think it looks pretty good” but her face was saying something totally different. Anyway, whatever, looks terrible. That’s why I now don the bandana.

2. All of the Zoom quizzes

It didn’t take long for all those quizzes to get stale. After the first week of quarantine I saw a couple of instagram stories of groups of friends showing off how much fun they were having doing these video quizzes. Then the following week everyone jumped on board. It was more of a pandemic than the thing that caused the quarantine in the first place. Even I was involved in several quizzes and it didn’t take long until the invites grew tiresome as hell.

3. Getting fat

I mean, what can I say, I was quarantined for months and all I did was eat burgers, pizza, steak, and fried chicken. I wasn’t allowed to exercise and so I gained a bit of Quarantine timber.

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